274. Extramarital: The prohibition against the Kohein Gadol having sexual relations with a widow

Put yourself in the place of a Kohein Gadol who loves a widow. “I can’t marry her,” he might think, “so we’ll just have an affair.” Sorry! That won’t work, either! Aside from the fact that extramarital relations are generally prohibited, the Kohein Gadol is specifically prohibited from intimacy with women he may not marry.

Let’s explain this verse. In Leviticus 21:14, it says that a Kohein Gadol may not marry a widow (or any of the women normally prohibited to all kohanim). Verse 21:15 continues “and he shall not desecrate his seed” through them. The reason not to marry them is to avoid desecrating his seed, so the Kohein Gadol shouldn’t think he can “desecrate his seed” with impunity by having sex without the benefit of marriage! (“Desecrate” is “y’chaleil” in Hebrew. The root ChLL is the same as in chalal, the offspring of a kohein and a prohibited woman. We see that the definition of “profaning his seed” means to have relations with such women.)

The rationale of “he shall not desecrate” applies equally to all kohanim when it comes to having extramarital affairs with prohibited women – or, more specifically, to not having such affairs.

The reason for this mitzvah is the same as in the previous few: the High Priest’s more elevated level of personal sanctity and the desirability of his partner not having someone in her past for him to compete with, if only in his mind. The idea of the Kohein Gadol attempting to circumvent the preceding prohibitions by having a sexual relationship outside of marriage? Let’s just say that makes things worse, not better.

This mitzvah applies when there’s a Temple and a Kohein Gadol. It is discussed in the Talmud in tractate Yevamos (59a-61a) and codified in the Mishneh Torah in the seventeenth chapter of Hilchos Issurei Bi’ah. It is #162 of the 365 negative mitzvos in the Rambam’s Sefer HaMitzvos.