Death and Mourning: Pouring Out the Water
There is an ancient[1] Jewish custom to pour out any bottled water which one may have in one's home upon hearing of a death in the neighborhood.[2] It is taught that the source of this custom is alluded to in the Torah where it says: "and Miriam died there…and there was no water for the congregation."[3] The "neighborhood" in this context refers to those within a three house radius in every direction from where the death took place.[4]
It also might just be that the origins of this custom lie in the words of the prophet who associates death and water: "for we shall surely die…as water is spilled."[5] One should also pour out one's water upon hearing that a non-Jew in the neighborhood has passed away.[6] Any water which one intends to spill out in accordance with this custom must not be used for any purpose, including washing any part of one's body, though some authorities are lenient and allow it to be used for such purposes.[7]
There are two reasons for the custom to pour out water upon hearing the news of a death. It is explained that the custom was instituted as a discreet manner of notifying others that a death has occurred without having to inform them directly. This is based on the idea that "umotzi diba hu kesil" - "he who bears bad tidings is a fool".[8] Indeed, the Talmud teaches that one should always make an effort to avoid having to be the one to bear bad news.[9] As such, when one sees a neighbor pouring water out onto the street one should assume that a death has taken place and conduct oneself accordingly.[10]
Another reason for pouring out water is because whenever a death occurs, it is believed that the Angel of Death washes his sword in the nearby waters, leaving a drop of poisonous blood behind.[11] Indeed, there was once a custom in the Jewish communities of Eastern Europe to prepare a glass of water and a towel beside the bed of one who is dying so that the Angel of Death may cleanse his sword and wipe it.[12] Drinking such water has been "proven" to be fatal.[13] While there are those who maintain that the custom of spilling out the water only applies following a natural death,[14] it is generally observed for even unnatural or tragic events, as well.[15] This difference of opinion is based on the question of whether or not the Angel of Death is responsible for all deaths, or only natural ones.[16]
Water is not poured out upon a death which occurs on Shabbat.[17] Among the reasons for this is in order not to ruin the festive Shabbat atmosphere of others with the news of a death.[18] Some have the custom to pour out the water once Shabbat has concluded, though others rule that doing so is unnecessary. It goes without saying that the custom of pouring out water upon the news of a death is not practiced in hospitals.[19]
Some authorities suggest that one should also dispose of any soups or baked goods that were prepared using water which was present at the time a death had taken place.[20] One need not dispose of ice cubes or other frozen bodies of water[21] and some authorities rule that water which was well sealed need not be poured out, either.[22] There is also a view that any water which has been modified and is now refereed to by a different name (i.e. tea, soda) need not be disposed of. There are grounds for leniency and flexibility with regards to observing this custom if doing so will cause one a significant financial loss.[23]
[1] It is first mentioned in Jewish texts dating to the 13th Century. It was observed by Christians in Germany and France at a still earlier date and was likely taken from them. In these traditions it was believed that pouring out the water would: a) prevent the ghost of the deceased from haunting those who continue to live in his house, b) prevent the soul of the deceased from drowning, c) the souls bathes in the water before ascending to Heaven and further use of such waters could be harmful. Cited in Jewish Magic and Superstition, by Joshua Trachtenberg
[2] Y.D. 339:5
[3] Bamidbar 20:1,2, Be'er Hagola Y.D. 340:8
[4] Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 194:9
[5] Shmuel II 14:14
[6] Pitchei Teshuva Y.D. 339:4
[7] Pitchei Teshuva Y.D. 339:4
[8] Mishlei 10:18
[9] Pesachim 3b
[10] Shach Y.D. 339:9
[11] Shach Y.D. 339:9, Taz Y.D. 339:4, Be'er Heitev Y.D. 339:5
[12] Cited in Jewish Magic and Superstition, by Joshua Trachtenberg
[13] Rema 339:5, Be'er Heitev Y.D. 339:5
[14] Lekach Hakemach;Aveilut
[15] Daat Kedoshim;Y.D. 339:5
[16] Rashi;Taanit 11a
[17] Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 194:9, Salmat Chaim 2:121, Shemesh Tzedaka Y.D. 36
[18] Pitchei Teshuva Y.D. 339:4
[19] Salmat Chaim 4:4. See also Chavalim B'neemim 2:70
[20] Pitchei Teshuva Y.D. 339:4
[21] Pitchei Teshuva Y.D. 339:5
[22] Gesher Hachaim 3:3:11
[23] "Mourning in Halacha" Chapter 4 note 23, Beit Yitzchak Y.D. 2:107