1,447. Statements That Do Not Effect Marriage

Hilchos Ishus 3:7

If a man says or writes to a woman that she is designated for him or reserved for him, or that she is his helper, his complement, his rib, or other such nebulous statements, then there is a doubt as to whether or not marriage has been effected. This is only the case when the man has already been discussing marriage with the woman; if they were not already discussing marriage, then such statements are certainly of no significance.

Hilchos Ishus 3:8

A man can effect marriage in any language that the woman understands so long as his statements in that language mean that he is acquiring her, as per halacha 3:6. If a man was discussing marriage with a woman and she agreed, and then he immediately put something in her hand to effect marriage or they engaged in sexual intimacy but he didn’t make an overt statement that he is effecting marriage through his actions, it is nevertheless sufficient because they had already been discussing it. Similarly, a man need not specifically tell the witnesses who observe his marriage or divorce that they are his witnesses. If he marries or divorces a woman in front of them, she is successfully married or divorced.