Golden Growth
Adapted by Channie Koplowitz Stein
In Parshat Terumah Hashem gifts us with His desire to dwell among us. In order for Him to do so, He commands us to build Him a dwelling place according to His specifications. He begins to inform us of all the specifications necessary for the structure itself and for the vessels within. The first instructions regard the building of the Holy Ark which will house the two Tablets of the Law Moshe had just brought down from Sinai. While the box itself was to be of acacia wood, “You shall cover it with pure gold from within and from without.” In other words, as Rashi explains, the Ark is to be constructed of three nesting boxes, the middle box being wood and the inner and outer boxes gold.
Rava says in Gemarrah Yoma that this arrangement of boxes for the written Torah is an analogy for the character of a true Talmid Chacham/Torah scholar whose internal thoughts and external actions should match. A Talmid Chacham whose inside is not as his outside is insincere. And Abaye continues by saying that such a pseudo scholar is called loathsome, “For a loathsome and tainted man, who drinks iniquity like water.”
Our first question has more depth than we would initially think. How can a Talmid Chacham be inside and outside the same. And Rav Sternbach asks a secondary question. On closer examination of the construction details of the Ark, the inner is really two boxes, gold and wood, while the outer is only gold. How can they be the same? The simple answer, as Shemen Hatov notes, is that although there was wood in the middle, both the inner and outer surfaces were gold. We will explore this question in greater depth further in the shiur.
How does all this relate to a Torah scholar? Rav Wolbe z”l cites the Rambam in interpreting this to mean that one needs to be honest in what he says, that what he speaks should not be duplicitous, but must reflect his true inner thoughts. Further, in any verbal exchanges, your word should be your bond and must be as good as gold. As Rabbi Frand writes, the Chazon Ish urged someone to keep his appointment at the agreed time even if it meant missing davening with the minyan.
Rabbi Weissblum brings an additional perspective to maintaining an inner and outer integrity. Sometimes people present themselves one way to the public but act differently in private. Public eyes watching may pressure a person to act or speak more piously than he is wont to do in the privacy of his home. One whose public and private personae do not match cannot become a true Torah Scholar. In fact, Rabbi Frand cites a dispute between Rabban Gamliel and Rabbi Yehoshua. Rabban Gamliel, as head of the Yeshivah, had instituted a requirement that an applicant would be accepted for study only if his “inside” and his “outside” were equally pure. When he was removed as head and Rabbi Yehoshuah took over, Rabbi Yehoshua removed this restriction and several hundred additional students were admitted. This depressed Rabban Gamliel, and he felt he had withheld Torah from so many people. But he had been aware of all these applicants and yet he had denied them. Why was he depressed? Rabbi Frand cites the Chidushei HaRim who answers that Rabban Gamliel saw the positive effect this environment had on the students who grew into true Talmidei Chachamim even though they were not at that level when they had applied. This growth he felt he had denied them.
Rabbi Friefeld z”l now moves to another point of symmetry. Hashem created the world with a sense of harmony, a harmony which is essence of the Shabbat menuchah/rest/sense of well being. A Talmid Chacham, through his intense Torah study. writes Rabbi Frand, is acutely aware of this balance, and a medrash actually equates a Talmid Chacham with Shabbat. A Talmid Chacham will do nothing to upset that balance and harmony, not in his speech nor in his actions, and he will have a heightened sensitivity to everything and everyone around him. He will recognize that a thoughtless word that embarrasses or even slightly discomforts someone may upset the balance of the universe.
The first goal of a Talmid Chacham is to eliminate contradictions within himself, writes Chochmat Hamatzpun quoting Rav Wolbe z”l. Internally, he must be filled with yirat Shamayim/awe of Heaven, while externally he strives for Torah knowledge and its application. If you work on the internal, your Torah will increase and will imbue your learning with passion and will impact your outer life. Torah study alone can quench your thirst for knowledge like water quenches your thirst, but it would not put into you the passion and heat of wine. You would remain “loathsome and tainted,” more like an encyclopedia than like a trueTalmid Chacham.
We live in a world of rationalizations and excuses, a fantasy world that disconnects our inner and outer selves. The biases within ourselves taint our integrity. We must know who we are as individuals, our personal strengths and weaknesses, what is appropriate for us not just in our behavior but also in what we are in a position to strive for. All our learning begins through imitation, but at some point we must reach within ourselves for our own, personal truth.
The Alter of Slabodka tells us that Lot was saved from destruction because he did not tell Pharaoh that Avraham and Sarah were husband and wife instead of sister and brother. Wasn’t Lot saved because he was machnis orchim, because he brought the strangers/angels into his home in Sodom and fed them? No, says the Alter. That behavior was second nature to him, having been raised in the home of Avraham Avinu. But to keep Avraham’s secret (Avraham might have been killed, but then Lot would be handsomely rewarded) was against his avaricious nature. He made a personal choice not based on what he had always been taught and trained to do.
Similarly, are we reciting our brachot by rote, because we were trained to do so as children, or are we seeking a personal connection with Hakodosh Boruch Hu? How much of our behavior is genuinely ours? The Talmid Chacham’s inner world is one of struggle and personal decisions.
The Aron was not all gold through and through, but had a center layer of wood. How does this wood connect to a Talmid Chacham? Rav Reiss in Meirosh Tzurim presents the center “acacia tree” as a metaphor for the Talmid Chacham. While gold is inert, a tree grows dynamically. So too must a Talmid Chachamcontinuously grow his inner world. But he must not let it grow wild, without constraints. There are boundaries which he cannot go beyond. He must limit himself to grow within the parameters of immovablehalacha, the golden covering.
A Talmid Chacham has to be alive in what he is doing, but he must remain true to his righteous faith,, writes Rabbi Pincus z”l. The difference between a computer and a human being is the ability to create and make connections. A Talmid Chacham must remain as vibrant as a tree, constantly growing.
Nevertheless, one must still maintain an inner core of truth, “Hashem is close to all who call to
Him b’emet/in truth.” One can go through all the motions and never allow oneself to reach inward to his inner core of truth. Rabbi Grossbard z”l references a Medrash about Yerovom ben Nevat, the first King of the Ten Tribes of Israel when it split from the Kingdom of Judah. In order to consolidate his power, he installed idols for Israel to pray to so they would not go to Jerusalem in the heart of the Kingdom of Judah for the three Foot Festivals. The Medrash states that Hashem pulled Yerovom by the collar and told him that if he would repent, “I/God, you, and the son of Yishai/David would enter Paradise together.” Not being content with hearing the promise and the order once, Yeravam asked who would go first. At that, Hashem said that David would go first. Yerovom refused the offer, for his ego would not allow King David to precede him. Yerovom was a great Torah scholar, but all his learning remained external to him, like the jacket he was wearing, never entering his inner core and redeeming him. He refused to acknowledge the inner, Godly core within him and therefore remained doomed.
What was Rabban Gamliel’s problem that he refused entrance to the Academy to anyone whose inner and outer selves did not seem to be in sync? He was afraid that their great knowledge would affect their egos and they would not act properly, would not serve Hashem with absolute truth. Therefore, we pray vetaher lebeinu/that Hashem purifies our hearts to serve Him b’emet/with the truth that is at the very core of our humanity, our tzelem Elokhim/image of God.
Rabbi Schlesinger notes that every Talmid Chacham [indeed every person] should carry himself with golden dignity on the outside, but remain humble on the inside. They both reflect the truth of a Torah scholar.
What is interesting is that although what we see is gold, we call the Ark an Aron of wood, notes Rabbi Kofman z”l in Mishchat Shemen. Each of us must be honest with ourselves and know our personal level of gold and wood, know exactly who we are and at what level we stand. Reaching beyond one’s current capacity is counterproductive, but remaining where you are without reaching higher, not believing at all in yourself, is equally dishonest.
To drive this idea home, Rabbi Kofman z”l relates a message from the Chizkuni. Korach was a great leader and scholar in his own right, yet he wanted more. When Korach rebelled against Moshe and Aharon, all were put to a test. Korach and each of his 250 men were to bring incense before God, as were Moshe and Aharon. Whichever incense pan Hashem chose would be the true choice of Hashem. We know the outcome, but what was to be done with the 250 incense pans that had been sanctified for God, albeit Hashem had not chosen them? Elazar, the priestly son of Aharon the High Priest, took the pans and made them into a canopy for the copper altar. The canopy would serve as a reminder to all who saw it that they should not desire for themselves that for which they were not entitled, that which was above their rank. Know who you are and your current limitations, know your inner truth, and don’t put on external airs of greater piety than you really are internally.
Nevertheless, internally you must still maintain your passion. Rabbi Beyfus in Yalkut Lekach Tovopines that the “judge” Rabban Gamliel used to see which prospective student met the criteria for entrance into the Academy was a lock on the door. If the student found a way to enter in spite of the difficulty, his inner passion to study Torah matched his outer words seeking admission. See what lengths Hillel went to in his desire to study Torah, almost freezing to death. This passion should follow through with every mitzvah. There are often obstacles in our path as we desire to do a chesed, for example. If we really want to do the chesed, we’ll come back again later or help in a more accommodating way. May obstacles can be overcome when the inner desire is truly there.
Although we’ve emphasized inner humility, we are reminded that the innermost layer of the Ark was also pure gold. We must never forget that our essence is pure with tremendous potential for greatness. Knowing that potential will keep us both humble and proud as we strive to reach that goal. Introspection will help us reach the goal Hashem implanted within us.
May we grow in such a way that the pure gold of our inner essence is always reflected in our outward appearance.