74. Rebuke
Deios 6:7
If one Jew sees that another Jew has sinned or is following an improper path, there is a mitzvah for him to correct his behavior and to inform him that he is harming himself through his negative actions as per Leviticus 19:17, “You shall surely rebuke your fellow.” One who rebukes another - whether it’s because the other person wronged him personally or because he is neglecting some religious duty - should do so privately. The one giving the rebuke should speak patiently and gently, letting the other person know that he is only telling him these things for his own benefit, so that he can improve himself and earn life in the Next World.
If the one being rebuked accepts it, good. If he doesn’t, the other person should rebuke him a second and a third time. A person is actually obligated to rebuke a wrong-doing fellow until the one being rebuked strikes him and says, “I will not listen.” If one has the ability to rebuke those who require it and neglects his duty, he is considered responsible for the sins he could have prevented.
Deios 6:8
One who rebukes another should not start out speaking to him harshly, which will embarrass the other person, as per Leviticus 19:17, “and not bear a sin because of him.” The Sages said not to rebuke someone so that his face changes color because the Torah says not to bear a sin because of him.
We see that one Jew is not permitted to shame another – all the more so, one may not embarrass another person in public. Even though one who embarrasses another would not be liable for the penalty of lashes, it is nevertheless a grave sin. The Sages have told us that one who embarrasses another in public does not have a share in the Next World. Therefore, one must be careful not to embarrass another person in public, no matter whether the other is a great person or a lowly person. One may not call another person by an embarrassing name, nor may one relate a matter that embarrasses another person in front of him.
All this applies to matters that are between a person and his fellow. However, when it comes to religious duties, if the offending party does not change his ways as a result of private rebuke, he may be shamed in public and his negative actions may be made known. He may be abused and cursed until he changes his ways. This method was employed by all of our prophets.