Still More About Jews and Non-Jews
Q. Do I need consent to convert?
A. Whose consent? Your own? Yes; you can't be converted against your will. Someone else's? Also yes; you can't just convert of your own volition. You need to study so that you'll be able to live Jewishly, and a beis din (Jewish court) has to "sign off" that you're ready.
Q. Consent as in a guardian, or does it vary by age?
A. Ah. If a candidate for conversion is a minor, no reputable beis din would work with him or her without approval from the candidate's parent or guardian. If the parent or guardian objects, the candidate would have to wait until he or she reaches the age of majority in order to convert.
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Q. What are some things that will happen to the gentiles in the end of days, messianic times, etc.? I see where a lot will convert or become what we call Noahide.
A. We believe that the messianic era will be a time of global peace and that all mankind will acknowledge the one God (presumably as Noachides). We don't really have much information beyond that.
Q. What happens to non-Jews when they pass away? Do they go to a purgatory or reincarnation or what?
A. We're not given a lot of information about the afterlife – just bits and pieces, really. Our focus is on the here and now.
As little information we have about our own ultimate fates, I'd say we have less information about other people's. What would be the point of that? To motivate people into converting based on the promise of a better afterlife? To gloat that our afterlife is better? Rather, we should all do what we're here to do and have faith that God has the afterlife all figured out.
In short, we believe that non-Jews can merit a place in the afterlife, just as Jews do. We're not really privy to the details.
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Q. I am curious... do ultra-Orthodox Jews teach their children to hate goyim/gentiles?
A. Thanks for your question. I don't know what people teach their children – I'm not in their homes! – but I know that Judaism doesn't teach us to hate anyone. Sometimes, however, distance can be mistaken for dislike. Certain communities tend to be more insular, and they don't have TV or internet, with the result that people in these communities are simply unfamiliar with outsiders. This lack of familiarity can lead people to distance themselves from outsiders, be they non-Jews or Jews from other communities. This may be perceived as hatred when it may just be discomfort due to lack of exposure.
Allow me to make an observation. You use the word "goy." While not inherently disparaging, many non-Jews (and Jews) find it offensive, or at the very least condescending. From the context of your question, I can infer that you aren't trying to be dismissive of non-Jews, but many would see that word and conclude that YOU hate non-Jews. Similarly, it's possible to look at the behavior of certain communities and draw that conclusion when it doesn't reflect their intentions at all.
Rabbi Jack's book Ask Rabbi Jack is available from Kodesh Press and on Amazon.com.