Kiddushin - Daf 81
- Rabbinical malkos for yichud, and the exceptions of בעלה בעיר and פתח פתוח לרשות הרבים
Rav said: מלקין על ייחוד – We administer Rabbinical malkos for yichud, ואין אוסרין על הייחוד – but do not forbid a married woman to her husband based on yichud. Rav Ashi said that even malkos are not given to a married woman, lest people think she committed adultery (and received malkos because the death penalty is not applicable today), and her children are mamzerim. Amoraim disagree if they can give her malkos and announce that it was for yichud and not adultery. Rabbah said: בעלה בעיר אין חוששין משום ייחוד – If her husband is in the city, we are not concerned about yichud, since she is afraid that her husband may come at any time. Rav Yosef said: פתח פתוח לרשות הרבים – If the door of the room where the yichud is taking place is open to the public thoroughfare, אין חוששין משום ייחוד – we are not concerned about yichud. Rav Yosef himself sought to prevent Rav Bivi (his guest) from being secluded with his wife, despite his being in the city, because she was a close friend of Rav Bivi’s, וגייסא ביה - and felt familiar with him.
- וה' יסלח לה – Needing atonement for intent for an aveirah
A Baraisa explains the passuk: אישה הפרם וה' יסלח לה - “Her husband revoked [her nedarim] and Hashem will forgive her,” as referring to a woman who violated her nedarim without knowing they were revoked, and it implies she requires forgiveness. Rebbe Akiva would weep when reaching this passuk and say, ומה מי שנתכוון לאכול בשר חזיר ועלה בידו בשר טלה – “If someone intended to eat pork, and lamb’s meat came to his hand (i.e., he intended to eat non-kosher but mistakenly ate kosher), the Torah says it requires atonement and forgiveness (as evidenced by a woman whose nedarim were revoked), מי שנתכוין לאכול בשר חזיר ועלה בידו בשר חזיר על אחת כמה וכמה – then someone who intended to eat pork and did, all the more so! A similar point is made regarding an אשם תלוי (brought for a doubtful transgression), about which the Torah says: ונשא עונו – “he shall bear his iniquity.” Rebbe Akiva would weep about this passuk and say, if one who possibly transgressed an aveirah, thinking it was permitted, “bears his iniquity,” then all the more so one who sins willfully! Issi ben Yehudah said about this passuk: על דבר זה ידוו כל הדווים – about this matter, let all those who mourn, grieve.
- Yichud with relatives
The Mishnah taught that one may be secluded with his mother or daughter. Rav Assi said: מתייחד אדם עם אחותו – A man may be secluded occasionally with his sister, but may not reside alone with her, ודר עם אמו ועם בתו – but he may reside alone with his mother or daughter, because he is not tempted to sin with them. Shmuel said: אסור להתייחד עם כל עריות שבתורה ואפילו עם בהמה – it is forbidden to be secluded with all arayos in the Torah, even with an animal. Shmuel is challenged from the Mishnah which permits yichud with a mother and daughter and responds that another Baraisa says: אחותו וחמותו ושאר כל עריות שבתורה – regarding one’s sister, mother-in-law, and all other arayos in the Torah, אין מתייחד עמהם אלא בעדים – one may not be alone with them unless there are witnesses present. It must be a machlokes Tannaim, as we find that Rebbe Meir said: הזהרו בי מפני בתי – Be careful with me that I should not be secluded with my daughter, and Rebbe Tarfon said the same about his daughter-in-law. A student mocked his strict practice, and a short time later sinned with his mother-in-law.
