Based on Ahavas Chesed vol. 3 chapter 2

We have seen how the Torah emphasizes Avraham’s hospitality, describing it to a degree unparalleled in all the narratives of Avraham’s life and deeds. The Torah is very concise in telling us that Avraham upheld the entire Torah (Bereishis 26:5), but it goes into great detail regarding his hachnasas orchim. We see that the Torah wants to teach us how to behave in this area, in emulation of our great ancestor.

At the start of the incident, as recounted in Bereishis 18, Avraham is still recuperating from his bris. Despite this, he is sitting at the opening of his tent in the scorching midday sun so that he might be able to spot travelers from a distance. When he sees some, he runs and bows down before them, speaking to them softly in order to entice them to enjoy his hospitality. Now, we might not go to the lengths that Avraham did, nor would we be expected to, but we learn from this that we should actively pursue opportunities to host guests, making them feel welcome. Think about how someone might act when hosting a prestigious person who could benefit him in business. Well, that’s how we should treat all our guests.

The Torah continues by describing how Avraham had water brought so that his guests might wash their feet. Obviously, visitors to our homes could often use an opportunity to freshen up upon arrival. This teaches us that hospitality is not limited to feeding our guests, but also with providing them with access to hygiene facilities.

Next, Avraham had his guests relax under the shade of the trees while the food was being prepared. We see that a host must provide his guests with the opportunity to rest and to recuperate from their travels.

Avraham saw that his guests didn’t want to impose on them, so he told them that he was going to prepare a modest snack, after which they could continue on their way (18:5). He then went ahead and prepared a full-blown feast in their honor. This is consistent with the modus operandi of righteous people: they say little and do much. Nevertheless, he didn’t make them wait to eat; each course was brought out to them as soon as it was ready. Avraham waited on them personally and, when they were finished, he escorted them out.

The Torah’s detailed description of Avraham’s hospitality teaches us how we should treat our guests. If we can’t do all of these things, we should strive to do at least some of them. Finally, we should instruct our children to likewise behave in this fashion. We learn this from when Avraham incorporated “the lad,” i.e., Yishmael, in this act of hachnasas orchim, in order to educate him in the mitzvah. (See 18:7 and Rashi there.)

Our great seforim write that when guest arrive, we should usher them in cheerfully and immediately place food in front of them. We shouldn’t wait until they request it because someone might be hungry but too timid to ask. The host should serve his guest with a pleasant attitude, even if he has other things on his mind. If the host has worries, he should conceal that information from his guest. A host should treat every guest as if they were a prestigious personage no matter their actual station in life, as this will make the guest feel good about their visit, rather than an imposition on the host. The host should not share his problems with the guest, as this will have the opposite effect and cause the host to forfeit for the merit of his hospitality.

When the guest eats, the host should express regret for his inability to provide even more, as per the verse in Isaiah (58:10), “draw your soul towards the hungry.” The word “nefesh” (soul) also means one’s desire (see, for example, Bereishis 23:8). From this we see that we should serve our guests with a sincere and enthusiastic desire. The Zohar (parshas Vayakhel) explains Isaiah 58:7 – “extend your bread to the hungry” – to mean that the host should personally cut bread for the guest. If the guest were in a position where he had to serve himself, it might make him too self-conscious to do so. Similarly, one should not watch a guest (or anyone, really) while he’s eating, as this tends to make a person self-conscious (and rightfully so!).

If the guest will be staying overnight, the host should provide him with the best bed possible, which is a necessity for a refreshing night’s sleep. A good bed can be even more important than the food which the guest is served! The host should put himself in the guest’s position and provide him with the amenities that he himself would hope to enjoy.

Sometimes a person might not want to host a guest out of concern that he lacks the means to honor his visitor properly. This is not a valid concern unless there is another potential host who is in a position to honor the guest more suitably. If that’s not the case, the proper course of action is to receive the guest and to honor him as much as one’s circumstances allow.

After the guest has enjoyed the host’s hospitality and is ready to leave, the host must escort him out. The gemara in Sotah (46b) discusses this mitzvah in great detail and describes its reward as without limit. The gemara there discusses the eglah arufah ritual, which was performed when a murder victim was found outside of a city. As part of the ritual, the elders of the city declare that they are not responsible for this person’s death. Would we really think that the elders of the city murdered a traveling stranger? The gemara explains that this means that they didn’t leave the traveler without food and an escort out of town. There is great reward for escorting someone even four amos (about six feet) within the city, but one who neglects this responsibility is tantamount to a murderer.

The gemara derives the importance of escorting guests from an incident in the first chapter of Sefer Shoftim (the Book of Judges). There, a man pointed out the way into a certain city. Later, this man built the city of Luz which, according to the gemara, was impervious to death. If such was the reward merely for pointing out the way, can you imagine the reward for actually escorting someone?

The Torah tells us that our forefather Avraham established an “eishel” in Be’er Sheva (Bereishis 21:33). Avos d’Rebbe Nosson (ch. 7) explains this to mean that Avraham built luxurious, fully stocked “Airbnbs” for the benefit of travelers. It would be a suitable emulation of our great forebear if we each had a designated guest room in our homes so that we would always be ready to host others.

It should be noted that, in Hebrew, the word “eishel” is an acronym for achilah, sh’siyah, l’vayah – food, drink and an escort – the primary responsibilities of a host towards his guest. (Some say that the letter lamed stands for linah – overnight accommodations.) And even if one doesn’t have sufficient food or drink to offer a guest, this doesn’t exempt one from the obligation to provide an escort or overnight accommodations!

If the individuals in a city don’t have the ability to properly house visitors, it becomes a communal obligation to build such accommodations. At the bare minimum, wayfarers need a place to sleep and food to eat. Remember how the elders in the eglah arufah ceremony had to declare that they didn’t neglect the murder victim’s needs in these areas! Remember also the terrible consequences that ensued simply because Jonathan didn’t think to give David a few loaves of bread, as detailed in our previous article.

It has become a practice throughout Jewry to establish community hospitality societies in order to facilitate the fulfilment of this mitzvah. Such an endeavor is indeed praiseworthy!

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