There is an interesting discussion in halachic literature regarding whether a guest acquires ownership of food that he is served. For example, when a host offers his guest some food, is the food served with the intention that it is only for immediate consumption, or is it given to the guest to do with as he sees fit? This can have extensive ramifications at hotel meals, all-you-can-eat buffets, and even at a Kiddush.

According to most authorities, a guest acquires the food that he is served and he is entitled to do with it as he pleases -- whether to eat it, save it, or distribute it. For example, a groom may take the food that he is served as a guest and use it to betroth his bride. We see from here that a guest acquires the food that he is served and it becomes his property to do with as he pleases.[1]

Nevertheless, there are reasons to suggest that this might not be entirely true. For example, a guest is not permitted to take any food that he is served and give it to other members of the host's family.[2] This ruling is largely the result of an unfortunate episode, cited in the Talmud. Each of the guests were served a meager portion of food and decided to give their meager portions to the host’s son. When the host saw that his son had all the food --with the guests having none -- he hit him in anger and the son died. The host’s wife was so distressed at the death of her son that she committed suicide. Finally, the host himself committed suicide, as well.[3]

It would seem that if a guest is not permitted to give the food that he is served to other members of the host’s family, then it does not truly belong to him. Similarly, the Talmud rules that if Shimon vowed not to allow Reuven to benefit from him in any way, Shimon may not serve Reuven bread if he happens to be a guest in his house. From here, it appears that a guest does not own the food he is served but, rather, it ultimately remains the property of the host.[4] Even according to the view that a guest does not own the food that he is given, he is, nevertheless, permitted to separate teruma and ma’aser from the food, should there be reason to suspect that it was not yet separated. This is because it is assumed that a person is happy to allow his guest to do whatever he wishes to the food that he is served, if it will make him feel more comfortable eating it.[5]

While it may appear that there is a contradiction in this halacha, this may not be so. The consensus of most authorities is that a guest is actually permitted to do whatever he wishes with the food that he is served, including giving it to members of the host’s family. It is explained that the true reason it is written that a guest should not give the food he is served to members of the host’s family is because doing so is bad manners and improper etiquette, not necessarily due to actual halachic considerations.

It is also suggested that the host might have personal reasons for serving his guest the specific portions of food that he did.[6] So too, a guest is not always aware of any allergies or food aversions that the various members of the host’s family might have. For this reason alone it makes good sense for a guest not to give any of the food that he is served to any members of the host's family -- especially children -- without first obtaining permission to do so.[7] Another reason cited is that there might not be other food available to replace it, leaving the guest hungry.[8]

In somewhat of a compromise, a number of authorities rule that the halacha depends on how the food is served, or more precisely, where the food is located. According to this approach, food on a buffet or serving platter remains the property of the host, while food that is on the guest's plate (even if previously taken from a serving platter) belongs to the guest to do with as he pleases.[9] This is based on the assumption that a host is pleased to provide his guest with as much food as he needs to satisfy his hunger at that eating session. The food remaining on the buffet or serving platter, however, remains the property of the host for him to use or serve at a later time.[10] The halacha is essentially in accordance with this view. Therefore, with the exception of some leftover food that might remain on a guest’s plate, a guest is not permitted to take home food that is served at a Kiddush or at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Similarly, a field worker is permitted to eat from the produce in the field while he is working, but he may not take produce home to eat at a later time or to serve his family.[11]

Rav Shmuel Wosner rules that taking leftover food from a simcha is a form of theft. This is because baalei simcha often look forward to taking home the leftovers to enjoy and use at a later time. Furthermore, a baal simcha can often receive credit from the caterer for food and drinks not consumed. If, however, it is known that the leftovers will be thrown away, it is permitted for a guest to take them home.[12] So too, it is permitted for one to take food home from a simcha if it can be reasonably assumed that the baalei simcha would not mind.[13] In all such cases, explicit permission should be sought.

There is some question on how to proceed if a drink company is having a contest in which one who finds a specially marked bottle cap will win a prize, and it is a guest at a wedding or Bar Mitzva who happens to find the winning bottle cap on a bottle of soda at his table. Who gets to claim the prize? The guest who found the cap? The baal simcha? The caterer or hall owner, perhaps?

Most authorities seem to rule that although a guest is not permitted to take home the drinks that are placed on the table, he is nevertheless considered to be the rightful owner of the winning bottle cap. This is because, although there is a general rule that a person’s property can acquire an item for its owner, it does not include an item that the owner of the property would likely never find or even know exists. As such, since it is unlikely that the host would have ever found the winning bottle cap, the guest is permitted to take it for himself.[14] If, however, the host knew about the contest and intended to check the bottle caps to see if he had the winning cap, then the prize, of course, belongs to him.

In deference to the view that one must own the matza that one eats at the Pesach Seder, one who has guests for the Seder is advised to explicitly declare that the matza the guests will eat in the course of the evening is being given to them as a gift.[15] Other authorities rule that it is not necessary for one to own the matza that one eats at the Seder in order to fulfill the mitzva.[16] It is worth mentioning that it is considered proper manners to leave over some food on one's plate at meals, and not consume every last morsel. This is especially true when one is a guest.[17]

[1] Rema, EH 28:17; Gra, EH 28:50; Aruch Hashulchan, EH 28:5.

[2] Chullin 94a; OC 170:19.

[3] Chullin 94a. See Mishna Berura 170:40.

[4] Nedarim 34b, Ritva.

[5] Maharit 150. However, Howie Bryks suggests, based on etiquette considerations, that a guest not add salt to the food he is served before first tasting it.

[6] Be'er Heitev, EH 28:32; Biur Hagra, EH 28:50.

[7] See Shabbat 10b.

[8] Magen Avraham 170:22.

[9] Be'er Heitev, EH 28:32.

[10] Shraga Hameir 3:90:2.

[11] Bava Metzia 87b.

[12] Shevet Halevi 4:225.

[13] Chashukei Chemed, Ketubot 2. See also Shevet Halevi 4:225.

[14] Although there is a general rule that a person’s property can acquire an item for its owner, there are some exceptions to the rule. It does not apply to items that are not usually found in such locations or items that the owner of the courtyard has no intention of acquiring, among other exceptions. This is consistent with the Rema (Choshen Mishpat 268:3) who rules that if an unusual item lands in someone’s private yard, and a stranger took it before the owner of the yard became aware of it being there, the stranger is entitled to keep it. But once the owner becomes aware of it having landed (and he wishes to acquire it), the stranger has no right to take it. Applying these principles to our case: If the baal simcha was aware of the contest and the potential value of the bottle caps (and certainly if he was making an effort to check the bottle caps), the bottle caps remain his as he certainly had the intention to acquire the bottle caps when he acquired the bottles.However, if the host/baal simcha/owner of the bottles was totally unaware of the contest, a guest may acquire the prize-winning cap for himself.

[15] Pesachim 38a; Sefat Emet, Sukka 35a; Mo’adim U’zmanim 3:266. See OC 454:4; Mishna Berura 454:15; Teshuvot V’hanhagot 2:240.

[16] B'tzel Hachachma 4:172.

[17] OC 170:3.